Safety Plan

For Women Experiencing or Recovering from Intimate Partner Violence

What is a Safety Plan?

A safety plan is a personalized, practical plan that helps you stay safe while you are in, planning to leave, or have already left an abusive relationship.
It includes steps to protect yourself (and your children), important contacts, safe places to go, and essential documents you might need if you must leave quickly.

Having a safety plan doesn’t mean you are ready to leave right now — it’s simply a way to be prepared, informed, and empowered.

Recognizing Warning Signs of Escalating Abuse

  • Here are some questions you can ask yourself to recognize when tension or danger might be rising:

  • Has my partner’s tone or behavior changed recently (more controlling, angry, silent, or unpredictable)?

  • Have there been arguments or accusations that feel more intense than usual?

  • Has my partner been using substances (alcohol, drugs) more often before incidents occur?

  • Do I notice body language changes — pacing, clenching fists, raised voice, or blocking exits?

  • Has my partner been isolating me more — taking my phone, keeping me home, limiting contact with others?

  • Has my partner made new threats — toward me, my children, pets, or themselves?

  • Do I have a gut feeling that something isn’t safe or that violence might happen soon?

Trust your instincts. You know your situation better than anyone. If something feels off, it likely is.

Building Your Personal Safety Plan

During a Violent or Dangerous Moment

  • Try to move to a room with a clear exit (avoid kitchens, bathrooms, or garages).

  • If possible, keep your phone nearby and call 911 when safe.

  • Create a code word or phrase you can use with trusted friends, family, or children to signal you need help.

  • Teach children how to call for help, and remind them not to intervene during a violent incident.

Before Leaving or Planning to Leave

Keep important documents, medications, and emergency cash in one place.

Identify a trusted friend, family member, or organization (like She Garden) you can contact for help.

Memorize or keep written copies of key phone numbers in case you lose your phone.

Practice how you’ll leave safely — when your partner is away or less likely to notice.

After You Leave

Change locks, phone numbers, passwords, and social media privacy settings.

Let your workplace, children’s school, and close contacts know not to share your information.

Continue checking in with your support system or advocate (She Garden can help connect you).

Your “Go Bag” Checklist

Keep this bag hidden or in a trusted location (friend’s house, car trunk, workplace, or with an advocate).

Personal Essentials

  • Keys (home, car, work)

  • Medications and prescriptions

  • Cell phone and charger (or a prepaid phone)

  • Cash (even a small amount can help)

  • A few days of clothing for you and your children

  • Comfort items for children (toy, blanket, etc.)

  • Extra glasses or contacts

  • Personal hygiene items

Identification & Documents

  • Driver’s license or state ID

  • Birth certificates (for you and your children)

  • Social Security cards

  • Health insurance cards / medical information

  • Passports, immigration papers, or green cards

  • Marriage certificate / custody papers / protective orders

  • Financial documents: bank cards, account numbers, checkbooks, credit cards

  • Lease, mortgage, or utility bills (proof of residence)

Important numbers
Keep written copies in case your phone is lost:

  • 911 (emergency)

  • A trusted friend or family member

  • She Garden (or local advocate contact number)

  • Local domestic violence shelter or hotline

  • Your workplace HR contact (if applicable)

  • Children’s school or daycare